Driver Hits Two Buildings; Man (And Car) Lost in the Woods

Drunk driver hits two buildings, including liquor store
A 68-year-old Cranston man is facing charges of driving under the influence after he crashed into two buildings in the same parking lot. According to witnesses, the man was in the parking lot at a shopping plaza at around 2:30 p.m. when he drove through the bushes just outside a liquor store, then put it into reverse and drove across the parking lot, striking the front doors to a Chinese restaurant. After slamming into the restaurant, the man “Put the vehicle in drive and accelerated across the parking lot, slamming through the brick wall of the liquor store," said Cranston Police Major Robert W. Ryan.

When officers got to the scene, the man was still revving the engine, but the only place he went was the Cranston police station.

‘Help, I’m lost’ … and drunk, too
The good news is that a 20-year-old Pawtucket man was found safe and sound after getting lost in the woods and calling police for help. The bad news is he was placed under arrest for drunk driving after South Kingstown police officers found his car in the woods off a long driveway. They found the man at the wheel of the car with keys in the ignition. He told officers that he had gotten lost and accidentally drove into the woods while attempting a U-turn.

Sometimes, the cops have it easy
A 24-year-old North Kingstown woman apparently made it easier for officers to gather evidence of drunk driving last week after a resident called police to report an accident. When they responded, officers found the woman’s car on a sidewalk with substantial damages, a flat tire, and a broken headlight. The driver allegedly had difficulty sitting up and then told officers that she “drank too much booze” and didn’t want to get out of the car. Officers, however, were persistent and insisted she get out of the car.

The fake bills are in the purse, the real bills are in the bra
A North Kingstown woman was charged with trying to use the same fake $100 bill twice, resulting in two felony charges of passing counterfeit bills. According to police, she attempted to pay for a can of hair mousse using a counterfeit $100 bill at the self check-out line at . When the machine would not accept the bill, an employee came over to assist. She then allegedly pulled a $20 bill out of her bra to pay for the mousse. According to the employee, who told police she had been in the banking business for 30 years, she could see immediately that it was a “very bad counterfeit” bill. The woman had previously attempted to pay for gas, a CD and a Dutch Master cigar at a separate gas station.

Oh, you mean THAT jewelry
A 21-year-old Johnston man was charged with larceny for allegedly stealing his girlfriend’s jewelry and hawking it at a pawn shop. When an officer asked him if he had sold the jewelry at a pawn shop, he said “No.” When the officer asked him about the jewelry he had pawned recently, the man said he forgot about that and that he had been pawning his mother’s jewelry for her. The story didn’t check out, however, when “Mom’s” jewelry turned out to be the girlfriend’s stolen jewelry. He allegedly admitted that he had stolen the jewelry and sold it for pills and money.

Sorry, officer, but those pot plants are ‘so cute’
A 48-year-old Tiverton woman was arrested for possession of marijuana after officers found six plants growing in her front-yard garden. Asked if she had a medical marijuana card, the woman said she did not, but "I knew that was marijuana when I saw them growing, but did not want to get rid of them because I thought they were cute."

Forgive me, Father … ‘You think something’s funny?’
The sanctity of church was disturbed earlier this week in Tiverton, when a 51-year-old man allegedly shoved another man in the back shortly after communion service and said: "You think something's funny?" The victim is apparently dating the suspect’s ex-wife, so there may have been some tension between the two.

Sex in a cemetery with a 14-year-old
A Portsmouth man was arrested on June 22 for allegedly having sex with a minor in a church cemetery. Police say the man and the girl had consensual sex, but because he’s over 18 and she’s between 14 and 16, he was charged with third-degree sexual assault.

Bully gets a field trip to the police station
You know authorities are taking bullying more seriously, when a 14-year-old, eighth-grader is charged with assault in South Kingstown for pulling another girl’s braid and slapping the victim in the face. The victim said she had been avoiding the assailant for a week because the girl had been intimidating her.